Up to Our EARS!

New Year's Day has come and almost gone. I always feel like a new penny on the first day of the year, shiny and new, unscratched or marred as yet by what the future holds.

In trying to eliminate clutter and get organized, I am suddenly struck by the amount of paper that inhabits my own personal world. While filling the tank with gas today, I was asked if I wanted a receipt, and of course, I punched the button for, "Yes." I'm scared if I don't, the pump goddess will spout all my information out to the next unsuspecting customer who stops to fill up. The receipt shot into the air and got carried away on a gust of wind. I watched it go and felt bereft. What are we supposed to do with all the excess paper we are bombarded with, anyway? It is hard to burn it, especially with ordinances about when and where and how and why you can burn anything. Ok..so I can shred it. Then, what do I do with all the shredded paper? I can't burn it. I guess I could use it for packing..but I never ship anything. I have receipts for everything. Sometimes I can't find the bottom of my purse for all the receipts. There are receipts for groceries, for a drink at the drive-thru, for an oil change and for Christmas presents, for a chili dog, for dog food and vet visits and a pair of boots I bought on sale that didn't fit. I can't even use that receipt to return the boots because they were on sale with no returns, so what good is the receipt? I already know I bought the boots. The receipt just ticks me off because it reminds me I may as well have dropped that money down a man hole.

On the other hand, just the second I really need a receipt, nine times out of ten, I can't find it. It drops into that black hole where all the missing socks go. I can find advertisements and flyers and bulletins and sale papers and credit card offers and catalogues and junk mail in all shapes and sizes that seem to think I'm running a half way house for clutter, but at tax time, I know I won't be able to find those receipts for my charitable contributions.

The bassets have simplified the whole issue of paper. They find it really has only one useful purpose. If they can't go outside, paper serves as a temporary "out house." I think they have the right idea.